The gift of painful life initiations – the experience and the lessons.
Whether you are a teacher, principal, parent or carer, you are first and foremost human. Life takes us all though initiations. These can be painful experiences, times of loss or a calling to make a change. This article is about my own recent experience with this process and I felt it was important to share here as its also about my transition to focus on Kindness On Purpose and my other vocational work on a macro level full time. Whilst this whole blog series is about supporting you, sometimes we need to hear others stories to know that our own life is normal and ok. Here is my most recent and most profound personal experience as I navigate the best way to share myself with the world and be of service.
Hanging up my 1:1 therapy hat … for now
After a couple of decades as a 1:1 therapist I have decided to hang up my 1:1 therapy hat for a while. I don’t know if this will be forever, it will be for some time.
I have always seen the process of sitting with another person, being present as they shared their most sacred personal experiences; to be a complete honour. An exchange between myself and another as we both hold a sincere focus on their wellbeing and realising their magnificence. Otherwise known as looking after their symptoms and perceptions and learning to live their best life. It is beautiful and I’ve been so very lucky to spend time with so many many quality human beings.
I have always considered 1:1 therapy to be part of my vocation and it will always remain so, yet for now my professional life is changing shape and in so many ways and for so many reasons.
I need to begin to step away from 1:1 therapy work full time and eventually completely for a time. Now leaving work as a therapist is not like many other jobs. You don’t give notice of 2 weeks and walk out the door.
In private practice there is a process of finishing the work that is before you, allowing new clients to enter only after a screening process and then slowly transitioning over. That’s the way I intend to do it anyway. I will leave ‘the how’ up to the universe to decide.
Listening to my body …
My body and mind are calling for a rest from 1:1 client work for some time now. They have been sending me signals that “its time” for the past 3 years and I’ve been listening, band aiding and then band aiding again. By the time the end of last year rolled around I was so depleted that I ended up with pneumonia for the last 3 months. (I didn’t know it was pneumonia until just before Christmas. ) That on the back of a relapse of symptoms from the vicarious trauma that began 3 years ago! “Ok body, you now have my FULL attention!! Sorry it was so hard to get through to me!!!”
As I recovered from the pneumonia I was forced to STOP, focus on ME … and oh what a grand experience that has been! Over the summer break as I healed physically, I began to explore so many aspects of my emotional, psychological and spiritual self. It was magnificent and I came to understand completely the word initiation to describe the process that I felt I was undertaking.
With school going back here in Australia my commitments start now. This is the beginning of my working year and I am so at ease and more connected to myself than I have been for about the past 3 years! I am pleased to share with you that I am stepping into 2019 with a greater sense of self love, self worth and self forgiveness. Yippee!! Isn’t that just so VERY exciting!
Self love, self worth and self forgiveness - the nurturing trio
For so many years now I have been saying out loud that I love myself. I can look myself in the mirror and feel a deep love for myself and my body. My ability to love myself came many years ago after doing some good solid on purpose work on myself. I came to feel a deep peace as I considered who I am, what is important to me and how I experience myself in the is world.
After some deep reflection and personal work over the summer; I can say for the first time in 45 years I finally have taken my self love to the next level; to authentic self worth. Of course it’s an evolving, ever growing process, however I can feel it - this thing called self worth for the first time in my life. As I explored, felt and came to profoundly know my worth, it naturally unfolded into an experience that I was not expecting – an initiation into the ultimate place of personal development and growth – the sphere of self forgiveness. And what a profound place that is to be!
As a result of this wonderful experience I feel like me yet very different.
Kindness On Purpose, Engage On Purpose, writing and speaking ….
Right now, in 2019 I have so many other projects calling every cell of my mind and body. Kindness On Purpose and Engage On Purpose need my full attention and I want with all my heart to follow this call. I have the need to create content to share with the world and I have at least one book that needs to be written.
My old self would say that the book is well over due and my new self knows that when it’s completed it will be right on time.
My life will continue as a form of being of service to others. The shape is just changing from 1:1 work to working with schools, organisations, the community across a national and international platform. I have taken what I have learnt in my micro 1:1 work with people and I am applying in a macro way to the world and I’m loving every single minute of it. It is now time to focus completely on this and support its expansion even further!
Profound appreciation.
I am so grateful for the work I have been able to do so far. In my therapy 1:1 work I met some of the nicest people in places that most of the world chooses to not see. I have experienced unexpected generosity in so many ways. I have been so fortunate to sit alongside people as they sifted through their pain and witnessed them see their own beauty at their most vulnerable moments. I have lived well in this work and I have always said that I would do this work even if I won a zillion dollars. It is simply what I am here to do.
And so for now I am saying a gentle and gradual farewell to 1:1 therapy. I expect the transition to be complete when the time is right.
I’m not going anywhere and I will still be here yelling loudly from the social media roof tops. I ahve bene given a job to do whilst I am here and its time to give this other work my full attention. from now on my main focus will be;
· Kindness On Purpose
· Engage On Purpose
· Perfectly Imperfect parenting courses
· My #KindLife series
· Clinical consultation and coaching
· And many other exciting projects … can’t wait to share those with you…
To my 1:1 client work I say “until we meet again” and to myself I say, ‘Thank god I found more of you and I look forward to experiencing life from this place of self worth, deep self appreciation, self love and the release that comes from self forgiveness.
Looking forward to this next version of my life….. thank you for listening and being such beautiful people who have granted me the opportunity to serve you in such a profound way.
With Kindness
Katrina Cavanough